Breaking In (FOX – Wednesday, 9:30 p.m.)

BREAKING IN is an offbeat half-hour workplace comedy about a high-tech security firm that takes extreme – and often questionable – measures to sell their protection services. Created by Adam F. Goldberg and Seth Gordon, the series centers on a team of uniquely skilled oddball geniuses hand-picked to work for a manipulative mastermind.

Contra Security, corporate America’s answer to “The A-Team,” gives clients a sense of security by first ripping it away. The firm is led by OZ (Christian Slater), a larger-than-life head honcho who is a man of mystery and master of manipulation. The members of the odd squad include alluring bad girl MELANIE (Odette Annable), who is in charge of lock-picking, safe-cracking and heart-breaking; and CASH (Alphonso McAuley), a fanboy who specializes in strategy, logistics and office pranks.

Oz’s newest recruit, plucked right out of college, is lovable and charming computer hacker CAMERON PRICE (Bret Harrison). Unfortunately for Cameron, cracking into state-of-the-art security systems is a lot easier than dealing with his co-workers. Between Melanie’s sex appeal and Cash’s hazing, Cameron has more than a few obstacles to overcome if he wants to cement his status as part of the team and become Oz’s go-to guy.

BREAKING IN is produced by Happy Madison Productions, Adam F. Goldberg Productions and Sethsquatch, Inc. in association with Sony Pictures Television. Goldberg, Gordon and Doug Robinson (“Rules of Engagement”) serve as executive producers, while Goldberg serves as writer. The pilot was directed by Gordon. – FOX

8 out of 10

OK… let’s start out by addressing the elephant in the room:  Christian Slater needs work and he needs it badly.  What we mean by this is that he needs a steady job because this is a bunch of absolute crap that since 2008 the shows he’s the lead on keep getting cancelled. Yes, NBC’s My Own Worst Enemy was horrible and we had to stop watching because the characters were so damned unlikable (and we don’t care that the overall Metacritic score was a 61, it was still horrible) but he didn’t make it horrible and The Forgotten was actually a pretty damned good show that unfortunately nobody watched.  That being said, we like Slater and we always have going back to Heathers (full film on YouTube, here… how cool is that?), Pump Up the Volume, True Romance (perhaps his best work), Hell… we even liked the skateboard flick, Gleaming the Cube (again… another complete film on YouTube!). He’s a good actor and he’s very charming and charismatic and is perfect for lead roles in television.

This all having been said, we sincerely hope that FOX didn’t jump the gun by premiering Breaking In in April instead of in their Fall 2011 lineup because we (surprisingly) really like it a lot and the professional critics at Metacritic can once again, be damned, for the 54 overall rating this time.  Now, we do have to admit that the relatively low “Mixed Overall” score was only based on 18 reviews and it’s usually about double that on Metacritic, so that number is kind of skewed and obviously (at least in our opinion) unreliable, but at least we can say that the Metacritic users got it right, averaging an 8 out of 10, which is exactly where we have it.

And why do we like it so much?  Simple: it made us laugh throughout the entire episode and it’s unique.  That’s all we ask for from our 22 minutes of situation comedy and that is what we rarely ever get.  Here’s our opinion of sitcoms in general as posted in our Fall 2010 Preview of Monday’s Programming focusing on the crapfest that is Mike & Molly.

As a rule, I’m skeptical of sitcoms to begin with because for the most part they are unoriginal and they all recycle the same stupid jokes decade after decade…  Seriously who does this simple-minded crap appeal to?

Bur we can’t help ourselves with Breaking In… we kind of like everything about this show.  The characters are unique and well-developed and the actors playing them do not fall into the stereotypical typecast of what you would expect.  Honestly, every character in the ensemble could have been cast for one of the other parts and it would have made complete sense on paper so it’s very refreshing that the producers chose to mix it up and not go the easy route casting the actors in the roles you would expect them to play.

Yeah, we can pretty much guarantee that this isnt the only time Slater has worn a Starfleet uniform.

The only character that couldn’t be recast would be Slater’s Oz because it’s honestly like this role was written for him.  He’s hyper and eccentric and Slater plays that very well. Not to mention what a huge Star Trek fan that Slater is (he even lobbied his own mother, Mary Jo Slater, who was the casting director for Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country to get him a cameo role in that film) and there were numerous Star Trek references in the pilot. Slater even actually had them put his own personal Enterprise Captain’s chair into Oz’s office and they worked it into the dialogue.

As far as the premise of the series is concerned, this is very unique as well and of course, a goldmine for potential slapstick comedy.  The one ting that isn’t unique is the style.  It’s similar in style to Rasing Hope, Community, The Middle, and Scrubs.  Now, even though we only like two of those shows (Rasing Hope and Community), we certainly appreciate that style of quick cut-scenes and rapid fire jokes.  We took two points off for the actual plot of the pilot episode itself being a little clichéd but overall this is a very good show.

As far as FOX’s decision to air in it April, we are going to give them the benefit of the doubt on this one considering how pleased we’ve been with them lately and the fact that even though it premiered in April, it is the lead-out for American Idol, which is exactly what we have suggested that FOX should do to help new shows build audiences.

Watch full episodes of Breaking In, here.

VIRAL VIDEO ALERT! What’s in Spock’s Scanner?, Humor… It Is A Difficult Concept.

Have you ever wondered exactly what Spock was always looking at in that scanner thingy at his station on the bridge in Star Trek.  We always assumed it was porn (Vulcan porn: Porn Fahr?). Well, after some exhaustive research done by Black Moon CGI, we finally have an answer.

Thanks go out to our friend Beth Sumner, for bringing this brilliance to our attention.  Check out her website, otakulab!

‘$#*! My Dad Says’ (Thursday – CBS, 8:00 p.m.)

$#*! MY DAD SAYS (pronounced “Bleep My Dad Says”), based on the popular Twitter feed by Justin Halpern, stars Emmy Award winner William Shatner as Ed Goodson, a forthright and opinionated dad who relishes expressing his unsolicited and often wildly politically incorrect observations to anyone within earshot. Nobody is safe from Ed’s rants, including his sons, Henry, a struggling writer-turned-unpaid blogger; and Vince, the meek half of a husband/wife real estate duo with domineering Bonnie. When Henry finds he can no longer afford to pay rent, Ed reveals a soft spot and invites Henry to move in with him. Henry agrees, knowing that the verbal assault will not abate and now there will be no escape. Describing their father/son relationship is tricky, but Ed will easily come up with a few choice words. – CBS

The Preview (Originally posted on 9/23/2010):

Shawn:

This is by far the most unfortunate post I have to write.  You see, I’ve been a big fan of Justin Halpern’s Twitter Page “Shit My Dad Says” for well over a year now and of course, I’m a huge fan of all things The Shat is involved with but I’m sorry to say that this is going to suck.  Not only is it EVERYTHING that I absolutely hate about sitcoms with the recycled and clichéd jokes, characters and plots it’s 180 degrees backwards of the whole premise of “Shit  My Dad Says!”  Just watch the trailer below to see what I’m talking about but first read this from Amazon in which Halpern explains the premise of the book bearing the same title:

‘At 28 years old, I found myself living at home, with my 73-year-old father. As a child, my father never minced words, and when I screwed up, he had a way of cutting right through the bullshit and pointing out exactly why I was being an idiot. When I moved back in I was still, for the most part, an idiot. But this time, I was smart enough to write down all the things he said to me.’

Now please explain to me how a wise-cracking jerk of a father, who’s apparently pretty senile and his sensitive and always correct progeny bear any resemblance to the description you just read FROM THE GUY WHO INVENTED THE THING?!

The answer is simply that they don’t resemble each other whatsoever but Halpern isn’t stupid.  He must know that this is garbage and that his new-found fame from this silly little twitter account will be over in about 15 minutes and he’s cashing in while he can and you know what?  I don’t blame him whatsoever.  If a bunch of no-talent hacks like the cast of Jersey Shore or The Hills or Keeping up With the Kardashians can get paid, why not a guy who has actually made millions of people laugh?  But please, be honest and don’t kid yourself into thinking that this is going to be anything but the highest level of suckitude©.  Believe me, I sincerely hope I’m wrong about this, but I know I’m not.

AND WHY THE HELL IS HALF THE CAST OF MADtv IN THIS???

The Review:

0 out of 10

Here are some numbers: 16 in the three-minute teaser, 40 in the first act,  26 in the second act, five in the closing of the show, for a grand total of 87 for the entire 21 minutes of the pilot.

Now, at this point I’m sure you’re asking, “What exactly is he counting?”  Well, I’m not going to leave you in the dark, what I counted was the number of attempts (and, yes,  I really did count) at what the writers apparently believe are jokes and the only reason I knew that they were jokes was because of the contrived and FORCED laughter from the live studio audience.  You see, I say that the laughter was forced because there’s no way any sane or rational human being would consider those ‘jokes” to be funny.  There has to be coercion involved and I suspect that it was at gunpoint.

And do you know what you get for the 87 attempts at humor in 21 minutes (at a rate of 4 per minute)?  Two actual funny jokes… and they were both gay jokes so out of the 87 attempts they had to resort to a stereotype joke in order to be funny.. and it wasn’t even that funny.  And for good measure, they did throw in a predictable dick joke that involved a vegetable… and that wasn’t funny either.

It’s official:  this may be the worst sit-com ever made.  It is far worse than I could have imagined.  It is puke-in-your-mouth awful.  The level of suckitude© cannot be expressed in words and in fact, I’m truly at a loss as to how to describe how bad this is on a level that human beings can understand.  It’s like trying to explain how the mind of God works.  I couldn’t do it and in fact I can’t comprehend it myself.  I literally cannot comprehend how bad this show is.

Everything I said about the show in the preview was absolutely correct, but worse than it bearing no resemblance to the twitter feed, as I noted it would be, it’s everything I hate about sitcoms on FLIPPIN’ STEROIDS.  I always believe that every show, even the worst of them, has some redeeming value.  $MDS has NOTHING redeeming about it, and I can’t believe I’m going to say this, not even the Shat.

In fact, although the character development and horrible writing of this show are not the Shat’s fault, I blame him for agreeing to this project after he read the script.

Every character and every actor in this show is awful and Will Sasso and Nicole Sullivan should be banned from television for five years for their horrible performances on this.

I want to forget I ever saw this show.

Watch full episodes of $#*! My Dad Says, here.

GEEK ALERT! CBS Releases Star Trek: The Original Series Communicator App – Nerds Around the World Rejoice

 

 

http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/star-trek-original-series/id377296514?mt=8

Not a whole lot to say about this as it kind of speaks for itself but now you can turn your iPhone or iPod Touch into a Star Trek Communicator à la the Original Series (TOS) for $1.99.  It’s fully functioning and the animated cover even “flips” open with a flick of the wrist (or by sliding your finger on it).  It can be used for fun or to actually make calls (obviously, only on the iPhone).  It features sound effects and clips from the series. 

Of course, the moment I saw this, I had to have it and the only complaint I have is that the animation on the cover has a serious lag to it when opening it.  Other than that though, it works exactly as advertised and you can’t ask for more fun for $2 if you’re a Trek Dork like me.